Unrequited
by Bekki
Summary: She never knew Daniel could have kept a secret like this. But Jack had. SD, SJ. Character death!


**Unrequited **

Summary: She never knew Daniel could have kept a secret like this. But Jack had. S/D, S/J. Character death!

Disclaimer: I a poor one am. Nothing do I have. Freely do I give

A/N: This story was inspired by Amaranth Traces' "**_Chemical Awareness"_**. A great read that, though prominently S/D oriented is still very worthy of the average S/J shipper's attention, for Amaranth Traces' thought provoking writing style, if nothing else!

Keep in mind that '**_Unrequited_**' takes that concept in the other direction

**Please review!** I'd really like to hear your feedback

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She held the envelope in her hand, the letter sitting still on the table. She didn't want to touch it again.

It all seemed so odd, really. If she hadn't been able to recognise Daniel's writing better than almost any one else's, she would have laughed and looked for the practical joker.

But instead, all she did was turn a pale shade of green.

How could he have never told her how he felt about her? How could she have never guessed? She tried to rifle through her memory for any kind of clue, but every time she saw him in her mind's eye, another tear fell and she could think of him no longer.

He really was dead this time. No white light, no superior race to come to the rescue, no wondering. He was dead.

They had the memorial service. It was even stranger the second time around. Jack couldn't speak at this one. He had said all he could have the last time Daniel had died. Sam knew that Jack thought his words were cheap now.

So Sam had spoken for their team-mate, telling stories about their great friendship, about how Daniel was an open book to any and all people he came into contact with.

Taking another look at the letter in front of her, Sam thought her words were cheap now too.

Sam was woken from her confused stupor by a knock at the door and a soft, "Hey."

She knew the voice and didn't bother to turn to face the door, knowing that Jack would come in anyway. She listened to his footsteps as he made his way into her lab. They were slow and laboured, unsure yet deliberate. She knew from the sound of his footsteps that he had come to comfort her, to be with her, but had no idea how to do it. It was the usual dance.

She focussed her mind on those footsteps, trying to drown out all thoughts of Daniel with the monotonous drum of her commanding officer's boots.

The rhythm stopped. Earlier than it should have.

Sam looked up at the General out of the corner of her eye, not wanting to face him just yet. His gaze was not on her but on the letter that sat on her desk. His eyes were wide and filled with a sorrow, a pity she did not see very often. Lost in his expression, Sam barely noticed when Jack's stare turned to her. She did not bother to hide her tears now.

But still, Jack said nothing. Sam furrowed her eyebrows as she watched his expressions change. She willed her mind to enter his, to see what was going on behind those brown eyes, but she couldn't. Jack was very good at being elusive when he wanted to.

She knew that Daniel's death had been hardest on Jack. Daniel had been so much in his life; the force that saved him from his own depression, a mixture between a brother and a son, a teacher and a friend like no other, and his reason for still being alive, many times over. She knew how guilty Jack felt that he could not save Daniel this once, even though he had so many times before. She knew that pain well.

But the pain in Jack's eyes wasn't of self-pity, though it was pity nonetheless. Sam followed Jack's eyes as they laid back to rest on the letter, so isolated on her desk.

He sighed.

"You knew," Sam said quietly, breaking the silence.

Jack did not look at her. "Yeah," was all he said.

Sam tried to respond, but there were too many questions floating on her tongue that she knew she shouldn't ask. Too many questions that she really didn't want to know the answer to.

"Why didn't he tell me?" she asked, her pain intensifying at the knowledge that Jack had known.

Jack gave a sad laugh. "Because he's Daniel," he replied, softly. "What would you have done if he had?" he asked, rhetorically.

Sam nodded.

"He knew," Jack continued, to Sam's surprise. "He knew that I…" he trailed off. Now wasn't the time for this. But she needed an answer, didn't she? Jack sighed and tried again. "He told me a long time ago. After we got home from P3R-118. He said I needed to know that he would never pursue you like that. That he knew you would never want him to."

"He said _you_ needed to know?"

"He never wanted you to know."

"But he could tell _you_?" Sam asked. She felt so confused, betrayed. Everything she thought she had known about her best friend had just been turned upside down.

"He wanted me to know that he'd never come between…" he trailed off again.

Sam's eyes snapped up to those of her C.O's. She didn't need him to finish that sentence to know who Daniel had not wanted to come between. "He knew?" she asked.

Jack nodded. "He wanted us to…" he couldn't finish the sentence. Not now. It just seemed wrong to bring it up now.

"He sacrificed how he felt because he wanted you and I to...? But he knew we couldn't," she protested.

"I know," Jack replied, helplessly.

"Then why'd he do it?" she asked, angrily. But she didn't need an answer. "Because he's Daniel," she whispered to herself.

Jack rocked forward and back, as though he was going to take her in his arms, but thought better of it.

"All this time I thought…" Sam mused to herself.

"Nothing's changed, Carter. You knew he loved you."

"I _didn't_," she fought, as the tears began to freefall down her cheeks.

"You did," Jack whispered back, "It doesn't matter how." He held her gaze with strong brown eyes. She nodded. She did know that Daniel loved her; she knew all her companions in SG-1 did. She just hadn't banked on Daniel _wanting _her, and never wanting her to know. She bowed her head as the tears started to fall again.

This time Jack didn't hesitate. He took her in his arms and held her as she cried into his chest. He buried his head in her neck as she sobbed and swayed slowly.

"Daniel knew that the team was more important," Jack said, cupping the back of her head in his hand and holding it to his shoulder.

"The team's always more important," Sam whispered back, bitterly. Jack lifted his head from her neck and looked up to face her. Noticing him draw back, she matched his fierce gaze, eyes red from her tears.

"He wanted you to be happy, Sam," he said, willing her to understand. She hadn't seen the anguish in Daniel's eyes as he admitted to being in love with their co-worker, knowing full well what Jack's own feelings were.

"Are you happy, Jack?" she asked, just as bitterly as before.

Jack sighed.

"The 'team' is gone, _sir,_" she said, spitting out the last word like an insult.

Jack knew that Sam's insubordination was only her grief. "_Daniel's _gone, Carter," he corrected. "Teal'c is still here. _I'm _still here," Sam blinked, as a stray tear wormed its way passed her pink nose. "Always," Jack whispered into her ear, and held her close again.

As she felt the weight of his head on her neck again, she sighed and found his chest once more. She could feel his breath on the back of her neck and stiffened slightly as his lips brushed just below her jaw bone. She leaned in to him instinctly and closed her eyes as he kissed her lightly on the neck, then on the cheek. She turned her head just enough that his third landed on her own lips, and she held them there, neither pushing for more nor drawing back.

She opened her eyes and broke the connection to look up at him. He looked back at her, his eyes now as red as hers, an unmistakeable understanding between them. He cupped her face in his hand and brushed her fringe back from her eyes.

The team had been more important for too long.

Jack turned away for a moment and picked up the letter on Sam's desk. He turned back and held it out for her. She looked at it tentatively, still not wanting to believe it. But she took it and leant back in to Jack's embrace, knowing what the gesture had meant.

Daniel had wanted them to be together. They owed him as much.

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